A complete guide to what men are really thinking (not much really...)

There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men think, 'I know what I'm doing. Just show me somebody naked' - Jerry Seinfeld

There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe swelling. So what's the problem? -Dustin Hoffman

According to a new survey, women say they feel more comfortable undressing in front of men than they do undressing in front of other women. They say that women are too judgmental, where, of course, men are just grateful - Robert De Niro


32 years old is significant, because at 32 you can sleep with someone half your age and not go to jail.

Sex is like a bridge game; if you don't have a good partner, you better have a good hand.

My brain is my second favorite organ. -Woody Allen

No one has ever died from an overdose of pornography."-J. Money and P. Tucker

And as to complete the toast, here's to our wives and sweethearts — may they never meet

When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men invade another country

A pessimist is a man who thinks all women are bad. An optimist is a man who hopes they are.

I am the fantasy

I have too many fantasies to be a housewife…. I guess I am a fantasy -– Marilyn Monroe

I’m not good or real… I’m evil, and imaginary — Karen, "Will & Grace"

Being a sex symbol has to do with an attitude, not looks. Most men think it's looks, most women know otherwise. ~Kathleen Turner

My life is a party

I have a lot of boyfriends, I want you to write that. Every country I visit, I have a different boyfriend. And I kiss them all -Anna Kournikova


"Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we’re here we should dance"

The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.

You can't have my number...

Lily Allen by Fashion Me Fabulous featuring Luella dresses

Yes we can!

Positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort. - Herm Albright

Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again, this time more intelligently.

You can turn off the sun, but I’m still gonna shine.Jason Mraz


How to Build Character - The Short Guide ---> get back up - repeat as necessary

There are two types of people - those who come into a room and say, Well, here I am! and those who come in and say, Ah, there you are. ~ Frederick L. Collins

I've decided that the stuff falling through the cracks is confetti and I'm having a party! ~Betsy Cañas Garmon

Why worry if people are jealous at you? Sit back, relax and absorb the attention

You talk it, we live it, you're jealous, admit it.

my name must taste good, its always in someones mouth

Plain women are always jealous of their husbands. Beautiful women never are. They are always so occupied with being jealous of other women's husbands.
Oscar Wilde

Men are the cause of women not loving one another.

The best revenge is massive success

How much better a thing it is to be envied than to be pitied.

Its good to have someone to blame

If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame

I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.

Take your life in your own hands and what happens? A terrible thing: no one to blame ~ Erica Jong